i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
