I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
