HIV tests are more positive than that guy
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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