Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
She's the barista slut.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
