That's when you crack a 10am beer
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
