So drunk, too bad you don't want this
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
