What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
