I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
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