my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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