I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
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