worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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