lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
