Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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