I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize