My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
