i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
