You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
your like the ambassador to my penis.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
