Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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