It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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