Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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