Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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