i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
He's on the porch naked. Help.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
