Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
