You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
