I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
