mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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