She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
