i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
