i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize