so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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