you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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