Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
