there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize