Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
