In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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