I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
