We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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