Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
