Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
