so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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