Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I'm at about main and main street
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
