Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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