Small penises have feelings too.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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