There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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