Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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