You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
