And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize