I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
The adults are the big ones right?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
