What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
