you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
