i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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