I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
