Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf

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(707): View more from California

Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.

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(734): View more from Michigan

Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico

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(864): View more from South Carolina

The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.

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(909): View more from California

Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.

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